So here we are with another leaker in the news. Oops, I’m sorry, did I say “leaker”? I meant whistleblower. Everybody knows you have to be high up in the gubmint to actually “leak” anything. Otherwise, you’re just a common criminal. I could quote 32 historical rhymes right now but I won’t. You know most of them already.
Instead, I want to point out some of the intriguing irregularities with the case of Mister Ed.
First off: he had a hot girlfriend. Really hot.
Meanwhile, the chicken hawks are lining up outside Fox News studios to denounce Mister Ed as a “traitor” and a treasonous dog who must be put down…via a CIA rendition if possible. No one sees the irony here?
Neocons are freaking about his chosen bug out location. They’re gonna really freak out when he goes to Russia next!
Let’s all just take a deep breath and calm down. Far from being this generation’s Pentagon Papers, Ed’s leaked documents merely add a bit more detail to programs we’ve known about for years. Most of this stuff is old hat. Everything you say and type is stored in a big-ass gubmint computer somewhere…for, you know, just in case you turn out to be a “terrorist” some day. Yes, Emperor Dumbya put it into motion in the wake of 9/11. And yes, Barry is playing along so that the real puppet masters can keep their eye on you and me without any pesky interruptions. We’re doomed. Big deal. What else is new?
So what should you do? Well, let’s just take one device as an example: the smartphone. I don’t have one. In fact, I refuse to use one. Even if you gave me one FREE, I’d toss it in the dirt and grind it under my heel in a trice. Non-defeatable remotely controlled real-time GPS tracking? Exif tagging on all my photos? Instantaneous monitoring of everything I say, type, and click? Subcranial glioma? No thanks. But the rest of you seem to like holding Facebook in the palm of your hand while you get your oil changed. For you I recommend this. It’s not a perfect solution, but it might just save your life.
You can thank me – and Mister Ed – later.